From Stephen Cabral
Do you feel under appreciated in New England, considering that you were the impetus for delivering a championship to the most championship starved city in the U.S.?
Not sure I’ve ever looked at what’s happened since then, with that perspective. I guess I can’t really worry or dwell on it. The guys I suited up with, played with, know, the Lord and my family know, and in the end those are the opinions that matter really. In the same vein, I know those same guys were in many ways every bit, and in some cases more so, responsible than I was. I think Keith Foulke was the single biggest reason we won (well he and Dave Roberts of course:). I still believe his post season in ’04 was one of the greatest ever by a reliever. Stats aside the workload, and results, were nothing short of amazing. The innings Wake pitched to save the pen, the job Bronson did, D Lowe clutching up in 3 series clinchers. There were so many things beyond my contributions that mattered, but the sock grabbed much of the news, which given what we did I think is a bit unfortunate.
But here’s the thing.
I’ve haven’t done any of the following: Hit my wife, hit my kids, cheated on my taxes, gotten drunk and driven, done drugs, used PED’s, been a racist, stolen, cheated on my wife, beaten an animal, talked behind a teammates back. In other words I haven’t done the things that make news and turn public opinion on many athletes.
Now don’t misunderstand me. That’s not to say I haven’t made my share of mistakes because I surely have. Anyone that talks as much as I have, and did, is bound to make mistakes. But I put my head on the pillow at night because I haven’t, and don’t make mistakes out of malice or ill will. I’ve said many many dumb things, and saying “well who hasn’t?” doesn’t make my mistakes ok, they just make me human, and I am ok with that. The only perfect human I know of walked this earth a little over 2000 years ago, every one since then has been and done wrong, everyone. Again, that doesn’t make it ok, it just makes it easier to live every day, knowing perfection, while desirable, is unattainable. Doesn’t mean you stop trying.
But the hatred, the vitriol, I’d say 90% of the ‘stuff’ that’s come out the past 8-9 years has as much, if not more, to do with my political beliefs than anything else. I can certainly appreciate and understand the difference in opinions, even if I disagree with them, but that’s what makes this country great.
As for 38, that’s certainly garnered the lions share of ‘news’ about me in the past year. The amazing thing is how much opinion has been formed with so little, very little, of the actual events about and around what happened, being made public. I created a company, invested over 30 million dollars of my own money into it, created and provided 400+ jobs for 5+ years, took an offer from the State of Rhode Island that ANY, and I mean ANY, entrepreneur would have taken. We had something amazing, something that would have been what we set out to make it, had it not ended when, and how, it did. There has been an amazing amount of anger, bitterness, hatred and other stuff from that. I can absolutely understand ANYONE that had issues with the original deal. I have always understood anyone having issue there, but there was nothing, not one thing, done below board. Once the deal was done I expected the state to be as invested in 38 being successful as we were, as I was, and that was where I made one of many fatal mistakes.
That is one of the most painful events I’ve ever gone through, still is actually. 400+ families lost their jobs ‘overnight’ for reasons that will likely come out over the next year or two, and when they do I’m hopeful people will see what really happened, and how and why it happened, and point the venom and anger in the appropriate directions. I do understand people bothered by the deal though, and always have. I think we made a big mistake at 38 by not getting more involved locally, in Providence, in the community more, to show them who we were, what we were doing because the people that worked at 38 didn’t deserve the public scorn, and anger, that they got. They were hard working incredibly talented people with families to provide for.
Went off on a tangent there (as I often do, but hey it’s my blog so I think it’s ok). But if you look at what’s happened since ’04, it’s never been about something I ‘did’ has it? I think it’s been far more about things I’ve said, which I can understand in many cases if you don’t agree with me on one or more things. Somehow I grew up the polar opposite of my incredible father, a man of very few words, but I’ve always been very obsessed and passionate about the things I believe in, the things I love, and when people ask me about them, I’ve never been a ‘canned answer’ sort of guy. Maybe I should have been, but that’s never been who I am, or likely who I ever will be.
At the end of the day I’ll continue to ask the Lord for forgiveness for the stupid and bad things I’ve done, and will do, and I can look my 3 boys, my daughter, and my wife, in the eye and know for better or worse, I am who I’ve said I was, and always have been. That’s all we’ve ever asked of our kids, to please be themselves, go out, change the world, and be themselves. If you do that I think you can put your head on the pillow each night and sleep.
Hope that answers your question.
P.S. I am not going back and re-reading or editing, so this is all raw, off the cuff stuff, sorry for any typos.